Cellar on Greene Review

“There’s nothing to winning, really. That is, if you happen to be blessed with a keen eye, an agile mind, and no scruples whatsoever.”

-Alfred Hitchcock
Yesterday I promised today’s blog would be all about exceptional carrot cake cupcakes, but I lied. In the two brief hours I had off of work today I shared a wonderful round of small plates and prosecco at Cellar on Green to catch up with the most lovely former coworker come friend, until we were interrupted and I was stolen away. As you might be able to tell I am little bitter. Why you may ask? Answer I shall.
It seems as if work ethic is a foreign idea to many these days, and blowing off work is not just not a big deal, it is par for the course.  This willy nilly approach ends tomorrow. All hail tyrant Cooktestant! Who am I kidding, my title would be more like Queen Passive Aggressive. While I work on my title, please pardon any missed posts as I will be setting both ends of my candle ablaze. Tell my family, friends and loved ones that I will be back soon, there just aren’t enough hours in the day!
It isn’t possible for me not to share the amazing meal I had tonight. You know when you go to a restaurant and the menu looks really innovative and scrumptious and then your meal arrives and 2 out of 3 items are good. There is just always that one thing that really seems to be miss leading (basil cheesecake at Social) or horribly prepared (lobster bisque at Morton’s, so I hear). Tonight’s meal = heaven! It was one of those rare dining experiences where each new item becomes your new all time favorite, until you become so confused you vow to never eat again unless the magicians in the kitchen are creating it.

Scene of the Crime

The Hoff (let me know if you hate your new name) and I met up at Cellar on Greene for girl’s night after trying to come up with a place that neither of us had been to previously. The Hoff cheated as she had been before, but she got a pass as there was no noshing, only drinks.

Not My Hoff

We just happened to hit Cellar on Greene on half off champagne night, otherwise known as Tuesday! Cellar is a wonderful place to sit and chat while you sip on bubbly and ponder all of the enticing options on the menu. The space is small, but welcoming and the seating is plentiful. We chose a spot at the end of a long communal table and caught up while sipping on LaMarca Prosecco. We were both huge fans of this sweet and refreshing bubbly. Thanks to our lovely and patient server for her recommendation!

Fizzy Lifting Drink

When we eventually stopped talking long enough to look at the menu we pretty much immediately knew what we would be ordering. We couldn’t resist three small plates of:

Basil-Dill Hummus with marinated cippolini onions, roasted red peppers, olives and pita

Almond Fried Brie with stawberry jam, bell’s honey and crackers

Seared Rare Yellowfin Tuna Nachos with green tomato salsa, cilnatro sour cream and pepper jack cheese

I so wish I had brought my camera to capture  our yummy order. The humus could best be described as the lightest, freshest, creamiest pesto the world had ever seen, except it was humus. The Hoff and I both agreed that the marinated cippolini onions that came with were amazing in and of themselves. I initaillaly ignored them as I assumed they were more of a garnish, but when the Hoff says something is super yummy you know I have to try it myself! The one downside, which was minor, was that there wasn’t enough pita to go with all of the hummus, and you know we had to make sure every last bite was as good as the one before. The additional pita was $2.

My personal pick of the meal was the Almond Fried Brie. Who got in to the deep, dark and dank caverns of my mind and figured out how to make three of my favorite things even more amazing. Please don’t discount everything I have ever said about food after this comment, but the flavor could be best described as the world’s most amazing Chicken McNugget. That is if the “chicken” was replaced by seductive melted brie and the coating was made from perfectly fried slivered almonds. And just like the McNuggets of my youth there was a honey dipping sauce only local and actually made of honey.

Finally, we had the Hoff’s home run pick, Seared Yellowfin Nachos. This plate was so wrong it was right. Personally, taking my favorite sushi pick and throwing it on a hot plate with cheese sounds a little odd. Oh no, where this dish could have gone wrong in so many ways it boldly smacked me in the face and made me take notice. The plate of chips with melty cheese came out on a super hot plate with cool lightly seared chunks of yellowfin floating on top. I could eat this for every meal of my entire life from now on. Please, please if you live in the Columbia area go get yourself some Yellowfin Nachos at Cellar on Greene. If you need someone to go with you, I am probably not available, but I gladly except doggy bags.

Once again, I am kicking myself for not taking pictures, but I will be going again, and again, and again once life regains a bit of normalcy. See you there!